Over a year ago, I found this incredible podcast about burnout. I think I've talked about it in every single group I've facilitated since then, and have texted or emailed it to everyone I know.
Here's one of the best parts -
"What we realized is that self-care is the fallout shelter you build in your basement, because apparently, it’s your job to protect yourself from nuclear war. So we talk about sleep, we talk about stress, get physical activity. Well, that’s not going to work if you live in a household where you’re the only person who prioritizes your well-being.
It requires everybody in the household agreeing that your eight hours of sleep is a priority, and we are going to cordon off that time and space and protect it, so that you can have that time. Self-care requires a bubble of protection of other people who value your well-being at least as highly as you do.
So the cure for burnout must ultimately be all of us caring for each other, and right now more than any other. We don’t do lean in, we don’t do lean down, we do lean on. Lean with. Pick each other up."
Since most of us are in Survival Mode I'd like to share a wonderful strategy from Brené Brown - her"Family Gap Plan" for when parents' energy levels don't add up to 100% (likely the case for most of us now... and to the incredible single moms out there - we see you doing EVERYTHING!).
She explains the plan in this podcast. But during survival mode 25 minutes to ones's self is likely not happening so here are the cliff notes:
She and her husband check-in with each other often, using a percentage number system. As she explains:
I talked to him on the phone last night, and I said, “Look, I’m on the edge. I got a solid 15 right now.” And he said, “I was at 15, I’m up to 40.” We got a gap, 15 plus 40, 55, we got a 45 gap to 100% relationship, 100% parenting, 100%… We’ve got a gap. So, what’s the family gap plan?
When her kids were young, this was the gap plan:
Happy New Year!
Yes, I know we're 10 days into January but I think you all understand. And, full disclosure, I'm writing to you instead of folding THIS mountain of laundry:
At least the bed is made?!
I have no shiny big announcement and no brilliant new ideas in these early days of 2022.
And that's okay.
Thoughts on pregnancy, birth and motherhood.